View Full Version : lol
stevse25
25th November 2007, 00:29
A boy is at court talking to a judge. He is
abused at home. The judge says "Boy, do you want to live
with your mum?".
"No", the boy replies, "She beats me.".
"Ok then, do you want to live with your dad?", the judge
asks.
Once again the boy says, "No, he beats me."
"Fine then", says the judge, "Who do you want to live with?"
The boy replies, "'Derby County! They never beat anyone!".
FA chief Brian Barwick is walking along
the street when he sees an old lady struggling with several
bags of shopping.
He goes up to her and says,"Excuse me dear,can you
manage?"
The woman replies,"Feck off,I don't want the England job"
Little Johnny goes to the toilet in the
middle of the night. As he passes his parents' bedroom door
he stops and peeks through the keyhole. He watches for a
moment, then continues down the hallway, muttering to
himself "...and she gets mad at me for sucking my thumb!"
Paul McCartney has healed the rift with
Heather, so has bought her a new leg for Christmas.
It's not her main present, it's just a stocking filler.
stevse25
25th November 2007, 00:39
: MURDERERS Need to dispose of a
body? Simply parcel it up and post it to yourself via Royal
Mail.
You will never see it again.
YNWA
25th November 2007, 00:42
Lad walks in whilst his mum and dad are shagging, the dad throws a pillow at his son and tells him to get out and mind his own business.
Couple of hours later, the Dad hears noises from his son's bedroom. He walks in to find his son in bed with his nan.
Son says "See, ain't so funny when it's your mum is it?"
C@rl
25th November 2007, 00:42
I like your Paul McCartney joke. :laugh:
stevse25
25th November 2007, 00:46
Lad walks in whilst his mum and dad are shagging, the dad throws a pillow at his son and tells him to get out and mind his own business.
Couple of hours later, the Dad hears noises from his son's bedroom. He walks in to find his son in bed with his nan.
Son says "See, ain't so funny when it's your mum is it?"
lol :Banana: lol
stevse25
25th November 2007, 00:49
The FA have asked Brian Barwick to get
his hearing checked over. They told him to "Go and hire
Gus Hiddink" and he thought they'd said "Go and hire a
useless dick"
stevse25
25th November 2007, 01:02
The Government is Going To Release a
Xmas 2Disc Album ?
NOW THATS WHAT I CALL
PERSONAL DATA
25 MILLION
laticfan1
25th November 2007, 03:08
:hmmm I thought my jokes were bad
powerage
25th November 2007, 03:53
Great stuff, keep em coming :laugh:
Zakboy_Afg
25th November 2007, 12:09
Theres three guys. They walk into a bar... Ouch!
blond and brunette jump off a 10 story building. Who lands first? Brunette; blond stops and asks for directions.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance. It had no body to go with.
bcfc4life
25th November 2007, 14:04
Theres three guys. They walk into a bar... Ouch!
blond and brunette jump off a 10 story building. Who lands first? Brunette; blond stops and asks for directions.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance. It had no body to go with.
ohh deary me :(
Zakboy_Afg
25th November 2007, 16:45
ohh deary me :(
A bit dry? :slap: :coat
bcfc4life
25th November 2007, 17:52
A bit dry? :slap: :coat
dry? nahh just sh1t mate :laugh: :thumb
Benzel
25th November 2007, 19:54
Theres three guys. They walk into a bar... Ouch!
blond and brunette jump off a 10 story building. Who lands first? Brunette; blond stops and asks for directions.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance. It had no body to go with.
STOP IT YOU'RE KILLING ME.
Diamonds Fan
25th November 2007, 19:54
Two crisps were walking down the street. A car pulls over and the bloke says "Hi. Can I give you a lift?" but the crisps reply "No. We're Walkers". You didn't see that one coming, did you?
Stej
25th November 2007, 22:45
Why was the butcher worried?
His job was at steak
All that phone sex has caught up on me
I have hearing aids
Three blondes walk into a bar
You'd think one would of seen it
Never tease a dyslexic dwarf
Its not big and its not clever!
Whats the difference between an elephant and a box of eggs (Wait for "dunno")
Thats the last time i ask you to go do the shoppin then!
Trick
26th November 2007, 01:00
The FA have asked Brian Barwick to get
his hearing checked over. They told him to "Go and hire
Gus Hiddink" and he thought they'd said "Go and hire a
useless dick"
LOL ****ING AWFUL, but I laughed.
Trick
26th November 2007, 01:02
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
He was out standing in his field.
Benzel
26th November 2007, 12:36
Why did the baker have brown fingers??
Cos he kneaded a poo.