Joke thread

Discussion in 'General Off Topic Discussion' started by johnnyT, Jan 5, 2018.

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  1. Tornado

    Tornado Registered User

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    Heh heh heh heh heh heh!!
     
    #1121 Tornado, Jan 22, 2023
  2. Garrincha

    Garrincha Not British

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    @Dirk 's favourite player isn't Keegan or Seeler, it's Kuyt.
     
    #1122 Garrincha, Jan 22, 2023
  3. Loueez

    Loueez The Dudette

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    How many psychiatrist does it take to changes a lightbulb? It doesn't matter, the lightbulb must really want to change!
     
    #1123 Loueez, Jan 22, 2023
  4. Tornado

    Tornado Registered User

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    ........
     
    #1124 Tornado, Jan 24, 2023
  5. Loueez

    Loueez The Dudette

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    Yep he alternate retort to ROTFLMAO!!!!
     
    #1125 Loueez, Jan 24, 2023
  6. Sandsy

    Sandsy Formerly known as manojob

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    Thinking of buying a house in Liverpool. It is a 2 up 5 down.
     
    #1126 Sandsy, Feb 22, 2023
    Panja and johnnyT like this.
  7. Garrincha

    Garrincha Not British

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    ?
     
    #1127 Garrincha, Feb 22, 2023
  8. Panja

    Panja In a land down under

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    Think Real Madrid..
     
    #1128 Panja, Feb 22, 2023
    Garrincha likes this.
  9. Garrincha

    Garrincha Not British

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    I was so scared of Iran I ran away from it
     
    #1129 Garrincha, Feb 24, 2023
  10. johnnyT

    johnnyT Well-Known Member

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    Got home from work an hour early today.I could hear groaning coming from upstairs so rushed up to investigate.

    I walked in the bedroom and there was the Mrs with a 12 inch cucumber pleasuring herself.

    I said you selfish woman I wanted to eat that later and now it's gona stink of cucumber.
     
    #1130 johnnyT, Feb 24, 2023
  11. JTC77

    JTC77 Ugistered Reser

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    Women are so selfish, cucumbers are being rationed now as well...
     
    #1131 JTC77, Feb 24, 2023
  12. Panja

    Panja In a land down under

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    I've invented a telepathically controlled air freshener. It makes sense when you think about it..
     
    #1132 Panja, Feb 24, 2023
    Garrincha and Sandsy like this.
  13. StretfordEnd

    StretfordEnd Fools can be kings
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    *scents?
     
    #1133 StretfordEnd, Feb 24, 2023
  14. Panja

    Panja In a land down under

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    It’s a play on words, Strett. Either/or..
     
    #1134 Panja, Feb 24, 2023
  15. StretfordEnd

    StretfordEnd Fools can be kings
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    It's a pun . . .

    :p
     
    #1135 StretfordEnd, Feb 24, 2023
    Panja likes this.
  16. zippy

    zippy The friendly Fascist

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    No this is a pun [​IMG]
     
    #1136 zippy, Feb 25, 2023
  17. Habbinalan

    Habbinalan Registered User

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    I bought a cheap 40 inch TV for £20.

    It was stuck on full volume because he had lost the remote control.

    For £20 I couldn't turn it down.
     
    #1137 Habbinalan, Feb 26, 2023
    Tornado, StretfordEnd, Vito Andolini and 3 others like this.
  18. Garrincha

    Garrincha Not British

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    :laugh:
     
    #1138 Garrincha, Feb 26, 2023
  19. StretfordEnd

    StretfordEnd Fools can be kings
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    Men.

    If you had the choice between a really beautiful wife or a really beautiful car which would you choose?

    Petrol or diesel?

    :coat
     
    #1139 StretfordEnd, Mar 16, 2023
    JTC77 and TLC like this.
  20. Garrincha

    Garrincha Not British

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    ?
     
    #1140 Garrincha, Mar 17, 2023
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